


welcome to forty

by peterandhispirate



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bar/Pub, First Meetings, Hurt/Comfort, Identity Issues, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-13
Updated: 2019-03-13
Packaged: 2019-11-17 15:56:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18101723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peterandhispirate/pseuds/peterandhispirate
Summary: "Nobody would have me," Josh insisted, because it was true. It had to be true. Why else would he be thirty-nine and living all alone?But Tyler said, "Bullshit."





	welcome to forty

Josh was supposed to turn forty tomorrow.

Was he looking forward to it? Not really. It wasn't that forty was _old_ , necessarily. People were constantly reminding him that his life was only half-lived - unless he happened to drop dead sometime soon, which wasn't entirely out of the picture. Maybe he was just disappointed. Disappointed in where he was, how he was, _who_ he was.

And sure, it was never too late to start over, but Josh had an incredible knack for getting stuck. Partly because he liked to "make things work." Never asking for anything better. Always convincing himself he didn't _need_ anything better.

Twenty years of grinning and bearing it.

It was that long-suffering attitude that led him to spend the eve of his fortieth birthday in a bar. He sat alone, because there was no one else to sit with, staring into his shotglass like most middle-aged men going through an identity crisis.

(Middle-aged? Did he really fall into that category now? Maybe it was time for him to buy a Harley and go blonde.)

Hair forming tender curls at the nape of his neck, Josh kept his head down and his self-esteem even lower. He had vivid memories of visiting a similar joint when he turned twenty-one. He didn't get blackout drunk or anything, because even back then he had limits, but he remembered having a good time.

Twenty-ish years later and the good times were few and far between. The last time Josh genuinely had fun was when he spent the day with his mom and they had lunch. Was that sad? Maybe. He couldn't tell.

He could never tell.

"Are you gonna drink that, or..?"

Lifting his head for the first time in fifteen minutes, Josh found himself looking into the eyes of a scruffy-faced stranger.

Of course it was a stranger. It’s not like he knew anyone.

"I, uh.” Josh cleared his throat. “Uh huh."

“I mean, maybe I'm just being rude and you drink through your eyes or something.” Scruffy Face raised both eyebrows at him. “Do you?"

Too self-conscious to actually laugh, Josh just snorted and said, “No. I wish."

"Are you kidding me? That shit would hurt big time,” Scruffy Face pointed out, finally taking a seat at the bar. “Plus you'd be an outcast. No one likes a guy who drinks through his eyes. S'not natural."

"Speak for yourself,” Josh mumbled, a smile starting to blossom at the very corners of his mouth.

Scruffy Face scratched at his jaw. “Oh, I'm perfectly natural. God pulled me from the ground Himself."

"I'm sure He did."

"So why d'you look so damn sad?" he asked without missing a beat, and Josh had to admire his nerve.

"I'm not,” he insisted, coming out the gate strong but faltering when he saw the look he was getting. “I don't think. I dunno. You're confusing me."

Scruffy Face squeezed Josh’s shoulder, setting off a landmine that turned his face cherub pink. “That's what I do best, pal.”

"Tomorrow's my birthday," Josh said, practically blurting it out. And then, more sheepishly, "My name’s Josh.”

"Tyler.” He was smiling. Josh never realized he could make people smile - other than his mom, of course. “How old're you turning, Josh?"

"Forty," Josh said, toying with his sleeve like that was something to be embarrassed about. As if aging was a mistake and not a fact of life.

But Tyler didn't seem to think it was a big deal. He tilted his head a little and said, "Do you think it'll feel any different?"

Josh shrugged, and there was no energy in it. "Probably not. The last five years of my life have pretty much been the same."

"Maybe you should take up knitting or something."

"Yeah, because that'll make me feel younger."

"It's not about feeling younger. It's about having fun. You need a hobby, dude." That's when he stole a glance at Josh's ring finger, curious. "Are you married?"

"Nope," mumbled Josh, who had been in the closet for the last twenty years.

Two decades of claustrophobia and breathing in dust.

"Girlfriend? Boyfriend?"

"Nah."

"Get one of those dating apps and put yourself out there," Tyler suggested, like it was that easy. Josh could already tell that they were two very different people.

"I, uh." He rubbed his chin, caught between a smile and a grimace. "I dunno if I'm cut out for that."

Tyler pointed a finger in his face, adamant. "You're never too old to find love, my man."

"Yeah, okay, but I'm... kinda shy."

"So what?" Tyler said, and Josh wished they could trade confidence levels. "Shy people fall in love all the time."

"Nobody would have me," Josh insisted, because it was true. It _had_ to be true. Why else would he be thirty-nine and living all alone?

But Tyler said, "Bullshit."

Josh blinked. "Bullshit?"

"You heard me," Tyler told him, and he was right. Josh heard him loud and clear. He just didn't believe it quite yet.

"I wouldn't know where to start," he admitted, fidgeting on the barstool; Tyler's response was instant and accompanied by a heaven-sent smile.

"I'll help you."

Josh's eyebrows nearly shot up to his hairline. "Wait, seriously? Why would you..?"

"I dunno. You seem like a nice guy." Tyler squinted at him. "Unless you're secretly a mass murderer or something."

"Of course not," Josh sputtered, then paused. "I mean, I don't think I am."

Tyler's mouth twitched. "That was a mildly concerning answer, but I'll let it slide."

"That's what I mean. How am I s'posed to fall in love if I can't even talk to people?" Josh said in a fit of helplessness, burying his face in his hands. "I haven't been on a date in so long, dude."

"We can practice right now if y'want."

Josh lifted his head a little, peering at Tyler through his fingers. "Really?"

"Sure," Tyler said, offering a smile that was meant to boost his confidence. "Give me your best pickup line."

Josh looked fucking mortified. "I dunno any good ones."

"Okay, here's a freebie." Putting his elbows on the bar, Tyler leaned in real close until Josh could count his eyelashes. "Are you lost? Because heaven's a long way from here."

Josh felt the blood drain from his face and then rush back all at once, compelled by the caffeinated darkness of Tyler's eyes. It was the darkness that led Josh to open his mouth and start babbling.

"So what if... what if I'm on a date and, uh." He swallowed. "What if we..."

Tyler's smile unraveled dangerously slow. "Oh, that's easy. You do this."

Grabbing Josh by the hand, Tyler led him from the bar to the bathroom and from the door to a stall, and sure, they probably looked ridiculous trying to cram themselves into such a tight space, but they were too busy going at it to care.

Back pressed up against the door, Josh let his head fall back while Tyler peppered his throat with open-mouthed kisses, each one hungrier than the last until his neck was a flowerbed of fresh bruises. And between each bruise was a whine, breathless and carnal, the soundtrack of Tyler's desperate hands as they roamed up and down Josh's sides, squeezing here and there and everywhere - lovehandles included.

Eventually the pounding turmoil slowed to a sweet, underlying hum. Josh let his forehead rest against Tyler's own, whispering, "Thanks for the tips, man."

Tyler's smile was twice as lovely up close. "Anytime. Happy birthday."

Josh turned forty.


End file.
